Trust: How Do You Define It?

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I was at an event not long ago where I overheard a discussion between two women. They ended up inviting me into the conversation to get my opinion. I found the conversation really strange, and so I thought I would share it with all of you.

The two women were discussing whether they trusted their husbands/partners with their smart phones. The idea was to trade phones with their husband/partner for an hour. Each phone had to be unlocked so that it could be gone through fully. All texts, emails and calls — the whole lot should be available.

Both women were really excited to go through their husband/partner’s phone and wanted more than an hour. However, when the talk came to letting the partner go through their own phone, that was a different a story. They in no way wanted to participate in that part; they were adamant about it.

I thought that was interesting. The idea of trust came up. I thought it was funny that the women wanted to see what their husband/partners were doing but seemed to be hiding stuff from their other half. What was it that they didn’t want found?

I have always believed that if you enter into a long-term relationship with someone (particularly a marriage), then trust and honesty are one of the most sacred parts of that relationship. What I can’t figure out is how a person can enter into that relationship and not be willing to share what’s on a phone. What was being hidden from those two women’s husbands? Is there another romantic interest or friendship that the husband/partner wouldn’t approve of? If they were not willing to share their own phone, then why should they be able to look at the other phone?

To me, trust and honesty represent the core of any close, long-term relationship or marriage. Trusting your heart, soul and life with another being is the key to a successful marriage. If you don’t feel safe with opening up to someone who is supposed to be that close to you, then who can you open up and share stuff with?

How do you feel about this? Please share your thoughts on this.

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